Using NLP as a Solution for Personal Conflict

Using NLP as a Solution for Personal Conflict

Personal conflict can be highly undesirable. It is experienced by a great number of people even though they might not know it for what it is.

It’s most obvious in the concept of dual personality where you sometimes act in totally contradictory manner to what you would do on a normal day. Like you have inside you split personalities having totally contrasting behaviors. Sometimes, this phenomenon makes it feel like you sometimes sabotage your efforts with your own hands. It can also feel like you are at war with yourself.

It is not everybody who experiences this personal conflict but if you are amongst those that do, the good news is that NLP can be used as a solution for this menace. In NLP, it is known as part conflicts. The ‘part’ as used in NLP is a metaphorical word used to group a set of behaviours together. It is like sets of behaviours that are together in a sub system by values and beliefs of an individual.

So these parts are the individual personalities that exist in such a person. So when one of the parts is entirely operational, the individual will not be able to access the larger system which defines them totally. If unfortunately, the part that is active is destructive, it can underpin addiction. It can also play out that the active part can be positive and this will form the basis of great performance and high levels of focus.

If we go on talking about this dual personality without a practical example, it might seem so alien to you not knowing that you are experiencing it firsthand.

Have you ever told yourself that you will hit the gym more often, eat healthy and do things that are generally good for your health but find yourself sliding back to junk diet and doing totally nothing about your compounding weight? This is an example of this conflicting personality. While one of you has carefully laid down plans for a healthier living, some other part is busy sabotaging these plans.

In the example mentioned, when the part that is anti-health is active, you will find yourself doing everything contrary to the things you have planned out. It will appear like you are a different person with different values.

What then is this Solution?

The solution based on NLP can be summarised into:

  1. Identifying the conflicting parts.
  2. Creating for each part a representation.
  3. Associating to each part an intention that it will be expected to follow through.
  4. Representing part on each hand and ratifying intentions.
  5. Sharing resources and getting agreement for the individual parts to come together.
  6. Integration of the individual parts to form a single coherent one.

Here we have seen that the concept of dual personality can be detrimental as well as advantageous to our performance. We have seen how to use NLP to go about it to ensure that our productivity is enhanced.